Emotional Regulation: A Gentle, Feminist Approach to Feeling Fully
By Monica Brinkman, FeministArt.ca
Let’s get one thing clear: emotional regulation isn’t about being calm all the time.
It’s about learning how to feel everything without abandoning yourself in the process.
For women and marginalized folks, we’re often told to be "less emotional," "less reactive," or to “just breathe through it.” But true emotional regulation is not about repression — it’s about resilience. It’s about creating space inside yourself to hold big emotions without being consumed by them.
As an artist and the founder of FeministArt.ca, I’ve learned that emotional regulation isn’t just a psychological skill — it’s an act of feminist self-trust.
And it’s a practice. One that can be messy, creative, and surprisingly beautiful.
💬 What Is Emotional Regulation (Really)?
At its core, emotional regulation is your ability to notice, name, and navigate your emotions with awareness.
It doesn’t mean you avoid anger or sadness — it means you learn to move through them, instead of reacting from them.
This doesn’t require perfection. It requires permission.
Permission to pause. To feel. To slow down long enough to respond instead of react.
🎨 How Art Supports Emotional Regulation
Visuals affect emotion.
That’s why I paint with earthy tones, flowing shapes, and grounded figures — not just for aesthetic reasons, but because certain colors and forms regulate the nervous system.
My pieces like Heart-Minded or Yoga Meditation were born during times when I felt emotionally overwhelmed. Creating them wasn’t about “fixing” my mood — it was about creating space for it.
Many people who collect my work say the same thing:
“This painting helps me feel more grounded just by looking at it.”
That’s the power of emotional regulation through art. It offers reflection without judgment. Stillness without silence.
🌿 Feminist Tools for Emotional Regulation
Let’s reclaim emotional regulation from cold, clinical checklists — and reframe it as a practice of compassion, softness, and power.
Here are a few practices I love:
1. Name It Without Shame
You’re allowed to say:
“I’m feeling anxious right now.”
“This sadness is loud.”
“I’m not okay — and that’s okay.”
Naming your emotion helps create distance between you and what you’re feeling — which creates room for choice.
2. Create a Visual Anchor
Keep a piece of art nearby that calms or centers you. Look at it during emotional spikes. Let your eyes trace the shapes, let your breath match its rhythm.
This is why Grow to Flow resonates with so many — it’s not just a visual; it’s a grounding experience.
3. Regulate Through the Body
Try a self-hug or butterfly tap
Splash cold water on your face
Lay on the floor and feel your weight
Breathe into your lower belly, not your chest
Emotional regulation is physical, not just mental.
4. Use Art as a Mirror
Feeling stuck in your emotions? Try sketching, collaging, or writing — not to solve anything, but to express it.
My painting process often starts this way — without a plan. Just movement, color, and a quiet release of whatever I’m carrying.
5. Self-Soothing, Not Self-Fixing
Make tea. Light a candle. Put on your comfiest shirt (maybe one of our art tees). Let softness in.
You don’t need to “get over” what you’re feeling — you just need to stay connected while you move through it.
🖼️ When Your Space Reflects Emotional Safety
Regulating your emotions gets easier when your surroundings support you.
This is the core of what I create at FeministArt.ca — artwork that invites balance, softness, and strength into your environment.
Whether it’s a framed piece in your favorite room or a wearable reminder like the Grow to Flow t-shirt, these visuals are designed to remind you:
You’re allowed to feel fully — and come back to yourself gently.
💌 Final Thoughts
Emotional regulation isn’t a destination.
It’s a practice of returning to yourself — again and again — with less fear, more grace, and deeper trust.
You don’t have to do it perfectly. You just have to stay with yourself.
And if you need a little visual support along the way, my art is here to hold that space with you.
With softness and strength,
Monica
Artist & Founder of FeministArt.ca
